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My name is Yaz, and this is my story

I am 15 and I struggle with Depression

I began having suicidal thoughts in the sixth grade. I thought that if I just didn't acknowledge them, just pushed them away, maybe they'd stay away. I didn't realize quite yet that the world didn't work like that. A year later, the thoughts became more frequent and I began cutting.

I tried to kill myself my sophomore year of high school. It was the day before Thanksgiving. I took 100 sleeping pills and 40 pain killers. The tylenol in those pain killers were very damaging to my liver. My mother found me, seconds away from sleep, eyes dilated, and took me to the ER. I don't remember anything after getting out of the car, but everything before was scary. My hands shook badly and I couldn't walk on my own. They say I had a seizure and that I turned blue.

When I was stable enough, I was sent to Wolfson Children's Hospital. There, they monitored the tylenol level in my liver until it was stable. Once I was stable, they sent me to the pediatric behavioral health unit for a week. It was nice to have other people my age that understood me and adults that understood as well.

After being discharged, I have been going to therapy twice a week. I feel worse. But I'm trying.

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