I am 50 and I struggle with PTSD
I am 50 something. I suffer from PTSD and Depression. I was abused sexually by my father from age 4 to 16. My mother suffered from PTSD as well for the same reason from her brother so she chose to ignore what was happening and became addicted to prescription drugs which led to neglect of myself and my siblings.
I did not know I had PTSD and Chronic Fatigue until 2 years ago but had been going to traditional talk therapy for over 25 years.
When I met my husband we had a beautiful life, we had our children early. Our lives together were story book enchanting. We did not have much money and did not let that interfere with our living life to the fullest. Then something happened, slowly at first. I would go into fits of rage at myself, I gave myself multiple concussions by beating my self and saying I am so stupid. My husband was very concerned and mentioned what I was going through to a friend. That is where I found some relief.
Fast forward 25 years and little did I know that the entire time I was self mutilating I was having PTSD flashbacks which was thinking I had no control. How very true that was, I had no control over my emotions.
Now with PTSD Therapy, massages, chiropractic care, and acupuncture I am able to have some energy. My story is not over, I have a long way to go to be healthy. I still have depression, I suffer from anxiety but am happy to say I no longer have flashbacks.
My life is unfolding, everyday builds on getting a little better. I have more energy most days and am looking forward to a wonderful life which does not include PTSD and Chronic Fatigue.
I feel blessed, read the bible every day, go to church; all these have led me to increase my spirituality. This has been so important in my Journey.
I hope and pray that if anyone reads this they will keep on trying and never give up. Live for another day of sunrises and sunsets and beautiful flowers three of the most precious gifts God has given us.
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