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My Journey/Battle

I am 18 and I struggle with Depression

When I was six years old I was diagnosed with a skin disease called Psoriasis. Psoriasis is when skin cells build up and create scales and itchy dry patches.Then in fifth grade I was struggling with reading and math. I was reading at a third grade level. I was tested and put into supervised study. Which is a one on one learning with a Special Education teacher. Sixth grade came and I was bullied a lot due to my skin disease.They would tease me saying “You have chickenpox.” or “Are those bug bites?.” At the time I didn’t know how to react or handle that situation I ended up crying a lot. In seventh grade and eighth grade I was mentally abused by a ex boyfriend who use to self harm in front of me. In seventh grade I then was suspended. I was very upset at myself for what I’ve done and I self harmed to help me cope. I never stopped cutting till I was in sophomore year of high school. You see, my parents never understood my Depression or Self harming I told them to go see Do It For Daniel. Which is a documentary about a kid who suffered with Depression and Anxiety since sixth grade. He also was in a special education class just like me. He then died by suicide. While I was suffering as well with everything going on, I showed my mom this documentary I started crying through the whole thing. I looked at my mom, and said “That’s exactly how I feel.” After it was over with I went for a walk with her and we talked about going to the doctor and getting medication. A week later we did, it helped a little. Like 15 doctor visits later and 1 hospital stay. I finally found the right medication. I then went on with school and everything was a little more easier. Of course I would still have those mental breakdowns once in a while but it was getting better. I ended up working out, and eating better for my mental health. It helped immensely. So what I’ve learned through my Journey is to never give up hope, there will always be a time in your life where everything is crumbling around you. But you have to look past it and think positive. The past, is the past. We all need to let it go, and create a better lifestyle and to better ourselves. Our future self will thank us.

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